Week 8

Spoke too soon - rushes out to be sick - spoke too soon! - fighting the urge to be sick again - SPOKE TOO SOON! - Cries.

The last 2 days have been the most awful, dreadful, horrific, horrendous, unbearable, sick-making, sick-being, nauseating, stomach clenching, shudderingly - terrible days EVER to be known to mankind.

Gotta give me brownie points for being able to stay creative eh?

Yesterday I felt like a miserable loser. I failed the "strong mummy" test. When it came to the afternoon I was in bed, passed out (not really, just Reeeaaaally asleep) and unable to get up when a little sad 10 month old was crying out for "mama" for age. Then Ross got home for his lunch, assessed the situation, fed Ryan, gave him juice and settled him down in his travel cot in front of the Telly watching children's shows. Then he left something for me to eat next to my bed and a bottle of water. The smell of shortbread was whafting over to me and was so offensive to my nose that I had to stuff them into the bed side table drawer.

I just cried and cried and cried.....ran a bath which turned out to be cold and lay in there crying and crying until no more tears would come.

So panic stations. The hyperemesis has hit and HARD. Ross got a brother to come over and they both gave me a blessing. Then I got bombarded with calls from sisters today. Cathy is coming over in the next half hour to give me a hug and help me today - she's gonna get some sort of routine going of sisters coming round to help with Ryan and help me get through it. I can't really believe it. Everyone here is just so loving and actually want to help me. I could cry - but unfortunately I did enough of that yesterday.

So Swindon ward is the biggest blessing in my life. Ross and I prayed ferverently that the sickness would go away so I could get through this but instead, Heavenly Father blessed me with a lot of help to get through. I'm seeing my doctor on Tuesday too and I'm going to find out what they can do for me. The biggest problem at the moment is I CAN-NOT-EAT. I'm like some crazy annorexic/bullemic (sp?) drinking isn't a problem, I can manage that. And I'm not actually being physically sick *too* much. But the unrelenting nausea....it's debilitating and it's worse on an empty tummy...but I can't eat!! See the cycle?

Here's to 8 more weeks of hell. At least I've got angels to help get me through. :)