Sunday, 17 May 2009

Induction Fears

The date of my induction looms ahead and It feels like I have a dark cloud over my head. My mind is so mixed up with different emotions that I feel the need to write it all down and do a pro/con list for being induced. So forgive me if this reads as just a lot of ramblings.

Pros:

  • I have a date, how organised, how clinical, how predictable!
  • It will be a controlled, planned birth - first goes in the gel, then the walking, then the drip, then breaking the waters.... etc etc. I will know roughly what to expect
  • I wont have any risk in having my baby at home or not having Ross with me

Cons

  • The much imagined frantic telephone call to Ross during work, and all the drama of rushing about and getting to the hospital in time like in the movies goes completely out of the window.
  • I will be "rushed" through the contractions and pressured to progress by the clock and to the doctor's standards
  • There's nothing "natural" about being induced, I'll have an IV drip, constant monitoring and a lot of medical intervention
  • Lots and lots of internals
  • Higher risks of fetal distress and ending up having an emergency C-section
  • Higher risks of being cut and having a ventrous/forceps delivery
  • The pain is supposed to be more intense - and they reccommend having an epidural, something I didn't want!

I can't believe I am actually having to think about the prospect of an induction being a reality. I had imagined going into the birthing unit, being free to move about, not having IVs and electrical equiptment all over the place, being taken care of by female midwives...I just imagined something so much more natural and calming for me. Hospitals (apart from cemeteries) freak me out more than anywhere.

I'm terrified. Absolutely terrified. Don't really know what else to write! I'll just keep begging and pleading Heavenly Father not to make me go through that experience - after such a gruelling pregnancy (where alas the sickness returned a few weeks ago) and a long one at that - I thought it would only be fair to have a somewhat normal delivery. All the false alarms, the niggles, the "this might be it" and no. It all stops and I'm in absolute agony in my lower back, legs, hips and bump from carrying such a big baby all this time! My baby boy is so special to me and I am fighting tooth and nail to get him here. I just hope he does his part - you'd think with his history that he'd be keen to come here. But maybe he's like his mummy and is weighing up the pros and cons as well.

Well I shall continue to gulp down the Raspberry Leaf Tea by the gallon (yuck) and bounce on my bouncey ball thing. I've come to the end. How I'll make it to Thursday I'll never know. Please baby, please come out. :(

1 comment:

  1. Unfortunately the IV thing is a given, they always stick one in whether you are going early, late, natural or having intervention. Miserable! Over here they put a really big one in because they wanted a line open incase they had to give me a blood transfusion after the c-section. I wasn't impressed. Don't worry as annoying as they are they help you to feel better at least so you aren't thirsty just tricky using the toilet. Just remember the hospital is the best place you can be. They have all the equipment to ensure you and baby are safe and thats the most important thing. I know we like to think about statistics but Ryan will do his own thing. If it is meant to be all will go well and he will come naturally, I know so many people that needed inducing though. I have a friend who had 3 inductions with each of her kids and she had great deliveries. Try not to worry just look forward to this time next. He will be here!!! yay! And then you'll never have to do this again. Or at least you won't this year haha

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